Monday, July 03, 2006

kid’s big wheel sitting on the shoulder of I96

Today I drove 120 miles, picked up two machines for emergency lobotomies, drove all the way to Byron Center to retrieve data from a machine that had already given up its hard drive to the great beyond. An old Sony VIAO that should have stopped working around ’02.

Weird thing: I saw some kid’s big wheel sitting on the shoulder of I96. That was creepy enough, you know the kind of Stephen King creepy where you wonder if the kid was on it or got lost in those woods next to the highway or whatever. Then, later on, there were kids’ toys strewn down the shoulder of 131. What the heck is going on here?

So I bought a new pool filter, chlorine, and shock for the pool that is looking a little green. I stopped by the bank, and again, there were people outside the door wondering if it was closed. I pulled on the door and it opened. People just can’t pull hard enough on that door or something, that’s the second time it’s happened.

And finally, I didn’t get anything to eat until 2:30. I drove like a madman to OCB (Old Country Buffet), the family silently praying that we wouldn't be killed on the way. My blood sugar was so low my hands were shaking, and I was HANGRY! (Hungry and ANGRY) I would have bitten the head off a small child if it wasn’t illegal. But luckily I got to the buffet before I saw any infants or toddlers, or I would by writing this with a crayon in a padded cell somewhere, and I’m not sure if I’d be able to post to Blogger from there.

So. I ate food, all is well. After that we bought fireworks. Just sparklers and snakes and punks and smoke bombs and those snapper thingys. We saw big fireworks last night, thanks to the neighbors. Plus the rich people by the lake shoot off fireworks every year a couple blocks from here, like, ooh, look at how rich we are, we can afford these expensive fireworks, woo woo woo look at us . . . oh, did I type that out loud? I might sound a little jealous.

I got two machines on the bench, the pool is clearing up, it’s the holidays, Deb’s picking up some booze. Let all peoples of Earth live in Peace and Harmony, and may the Spirit of Elvis Serve and Protect you.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Where's the new podcast ?


About Me

My photo
I am the author of 5 books: Android Down, Firewood for Cannibals, The Cubicles of Madness, Robot Stories, and most recently, Various Meats and Cheeses. I live and write in Michigan. My website is at