Friday, June 27, 2008

onion ring smiles

Yes, onion rings are delicious!

Oh Andy

I didn't know this shirt existed until I went into McDonald's across from the bank and had some breakfast.

A giant Andy Griffith shirt. Awesome

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

book review: I Am America (And So Can You!)

#50 I Am America (And So Can You!) Stephen Colbert 2007 * * * * * This is the funniest thing I've read in years. I was crying from laughing so hard. Not since Steve Martin's Cruel Shoes have I laughed this hard. ~ June 17, 2008

Why does God hate Iowa?

Why does God hate Iowa? Is it their incessant church-going? All the praying? The All-Americanism? Why does God hate Iowa? Why has he sent his mighty flood to destroy them? What have they done to deserve God's mighty wrath?

What message is Our Lord sending us? Why does he spare Utah, with its crazy polygamy sects and its salty, salty lake? Shouldn't he smite Utah?

What is it that God hates about the down-home, middle-class values found in Iowa?

Why does God hate Iowa? Is turning corn into ethanol some sort of abomination? Does God hate overalls? Or has the idol worship of John Deer tractors finally aroused God's mighty wrath?

Is it the surly, sexual undertones of today's modern Country Music with its exaltation of alcohol-fueled honky-tonk sexual congress with relative strangers?

Why does God hate Iowa? Why?

Monday, June 16, 2008

generic blog post posted on Monday

I haven't written anything in awhile. Friday I dropped Deb and the girls off at the campsite with Deb's friend Amy. I had to come back and take care of the dog. Of course, I immediately went to the bar and got smashed. I really have to stop doing that.

I wasn't as hung-over Saturday morning as I deserved, so I drove out to the camp-grounds and stayed all day and overnight and had a great time. Took Alex, Savannah and Sidney kayaking in the little lake they have there. The place is surrounded by camp sites, some of them with huge mobile home like campers with permanent picket fences around them, and the people stay there six months out of the year pretty cheap. It would be a nice way to live.

I swiped Clear and Present Danger by Tom Clancy from the club-house there at the campsite.

Since Sunday was Father's Day, I lounged around the campsite all morning and did nothing while the women-folk served me breakfast. That's the way it ought to be.

It was very relaxing, and we came home yesterday. I ended up running 11 miles, but I had set out to do 14.

Today at a building downtown I connected an air-conditioning control system with the Internets and allowed remote access for the company that runs the system. I talked someone out of getting their laptop fixed because the money they would have spent would have been enough to buy a new one. I'm still getting paid to transfer the files and such.

I'm reading I Am America, and So Can You! by Stephen Colbert. I was laughing so hard, Alex thought I was crying in bed. Which I wasn't. I was laughing.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Book Review: Four Great Russian Short Novels

#49 Four Great Russian Short Novels Dell Publishing 1959 * * * Actually, I only read three of them. First Love, by Ivan Turgenev, 1860; The Gambler, by Fyodor Dostoyevsky, 1866 and Master And Man, by Leo Tolstoy, 1895. After three Russian novels, I was sick of Russian Novels. Of the three, The Gambler was the best. It was funny. Weird how people lived off each other, giving each other "allowances" and "stipends" and paying for each other's hotel bills. ~ June 10, 2008

see all my book reviews

Friday, June 06, 2008

my site rocks!

according to, is #19,1260,792 in Internet traffic! That's 0.000002132982% of all Internet traffic! Rock on!

About Me

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I am the author of 5 books: Android Down, Firewood for Cannibals, The Cubicles of Madness, Robot Stories, and most recently, Various Meats and Cheeses. I live and write in Michigan. My website is at